We’ve started doing something new around here.

We have two occasional chairs that are tucked into a recessed bookcase in our living room. They are the kind of chairs that typically only get used when we have a roomful of people, but we both love them. There is something very calming about sitting there, where you can see the fireplace, and the rest of the room as you look out the windows beyond. It’s the only place in the room where you have that particular vantage point.

One evening, not too long ago, I found Kevin sitting there with his iPad. He told me that he’d just decided those chairs needed to be used more often. I was in the middle of making dinner at the time, so the next night, I got dinner started, then got both of us something to drink, and we sat there together without any technology. I put on one of the old big band albums we recently got from his mother, and, with a fresh fire blazing, we sat for about an hour and just talked.

And laughed.

And dreamed.

We both loved it so much that we’ve started making “chair time” a nightly ritual.

You wouldn’t think that you’d need specific time, like that, to be carved out when you’ve been married over 30 years, but you do. You need it no matter how long you’ve been married. Our days are so jam-packed with busy, and we are so exceptionally connected with every other person (we may or may not know) through technology, that we stand to lose the most important connection of all in the midst.

If we don’t have actual time set aside to step off the world and enjoy real face time, our living together becomes a parallel affair almost as virtual as if we were FaceTiming through a screen.

I’m so glad he decided to use those chairs. Why don’t you look around and see what “chair time” might be waiting for you in your house? I mean, you loved those chairs when you bought them, so why not use them? They may be the very things that tie those parallel lives together with a brand new, shared, vantage point.


Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one mind and purpose.” Philippians 2:2 NLT

“And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” Colossians 3:14 ESV

“Finally, brothers, rejoice. Aim for restoration, comfort one another, agree with one another, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you.” 2 Corinthians 13:11 ESV

“So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.” Romans 14:19 ESV