I read a quote recently, that I have actually lived. “Even a good thing can weigh us down if it isn’t the best thing.” Oh, how true that is.
There are a lot of good things out there. Causes worthy of our time, church or civic projects needy of our talents, studies that will enrich our lives, and on and on. In fact, there are SO many options that it is often hard to discern what we need to do…or NOT do. If they’re all worthwhile, then shouldn’t we give ourselves over to every one? The answer, of course, is NO. However, NO is a lesson hard-learned.
Several years ago, I was a God-serving maniac. That almost sounds a little irreverent, but let me explain. I was all of the following at my church:
Director of Women’s Ministries
Worship Team Singer
Bible Study Teacher
Small Group Leader (with Kevin)
On top of the church stuff, I was the owner of my own interior design business, and, oh yeah, a wife and mother. I could probably stop right here, and you would understand why I identify with the quote! But wait – there’s more!
One day, when I was ready to run out the door for yet another meeting, and there was no food for dinner and no one had clean underwear (NO one!!), I began to feel convicted. And tired. And frustrated. I noticed that there was not harmony in my home, but a distinct discord. The Still Small Voice said “Stop”. My not-so-still voice said “How can I? It will all fall apart without me. I’m serving YOU, Lord. These are all things that glorify You.” Then He said the clincher, “When was the last time you actually spent time with Me?”. Ouch. What He wanted (and didn’t back down on until I relented), was for me to lay down all the “good things” for the “BEST thing”. He made it very clear over the next few weeks that I was to lay it ALL down. And I did. Every last thing. Even my business.
Amazingly, things did not fall apart without me. In fact, my priorities came back into balance. My husband began to feel cared for again, and the family was thrilled to have food and clean underwear on a regular basis, and a mother that was not only physically there, but mentally as well! When I became still, and began to let the Lord fill my tank up again, the benefits flowed down to my family. I was able to actually hear what God wanted me to do with my time and filter my options to make sure that they were the things that would enhance my walk and not weigh me down.
We’re are not all meant for ALL good things…but we ARE all meant for the BEST thing.
I remember that week or so in your life. I did not know all of the details at the time, but I do remember Emmie showing up at our house, and not to babysit, just to show up and eat dinner:) She was feeling so disconnected from her family ~ my words; not hers. After she left, Mark and I chuckled about how hard it is to be a teenager and ACT like you don’t need your parents, but when they are not there, you seek them out in the family down the street:)
Within a week, or maybe just days, of that, Emmie said that you had quit your job, and that there was food in the house…even food that she had asked for, not just what you usually buy! I thought it was cute that is how she looked at it.
Again, I thank you for allowing me to learn through you and the lessons you have already lived.
Wow can I relate to that place right now. I can’t wait until the summer is over – just so that a few more of my responsibilities as church planters wife can be crossed off. Thanks for your encouraging words. This young mother needed that. I often say you are defined by what you say NO to. Its been a little hard saying no lately, and I have personally felt the effects from it.
Its great to hear your story and learn from your example. Amy sends me excerpts from your blog all the time.
TO DARA:
Ahhh…the church plant – home of the multiple-hat-wearers! :o) While the pastor’s wife may not have a bunch of titles after her name, the title “pastor’s wife” seems to bring with it the tallest stack of “hats”. I’ve known well, and served with, 5 different pastor’s wives, ALL of which planted the churches they are in. You have the kind of responsibilities that you can’t easily walk away from; the ones I’ve known who have done the best job at balancing things, are the ones that work quickly to replace themselves as leaders of groups, or bring in a co-leader from the beginning that will eventually take over. The church plant that we were a part of in Iowa, has a pastor that signed a covenant with each new member. There were 10 things that he promised and one of them has become a pole star of sorts, when it comes to volunteering with the church…”I will not sacrifice my family on the altar of the church.” I love that, and it’s really helped me keep things in perspective. I so admire what you are doing – just stay plugged in to the BEST thing and He will take care of the rest!
TO AMY:
I can only laugh when I read your comment! Those were harrowing times – thanks for listening to, and feeding :o), my daughter, and for not thinking her mother was unfit!